COMPLEXITIES OF DEFINING THE WORD LOVE AND ISSUES OF SEXUALITY THROUGHOUT COURTSHIP AND MARRIED LIFE

Complexities of defining the word love and issues of sexuality throughout courtship and married life

Abstract

Marriage is the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life (or until divorce). When people are allowed to get married to only one person is called' Monogamy'. Marriage is also a creation ordinance of the highest calling. God has created us as men and women in order that we in godly marriages reflect some of his own nature, that we be a visualization of his glory.

Complexities of defining the word love and issues of sexuality throughout courtship and married life

Introduction

Marriages are made, not in heaven, but by wonderfully fallible human beings who hope for the best, but who often do precious little to make this most challenging and complicated relationship work. From the very first couple and their differing view point over the apple to modern times, men and women have always disagreed. Both sexes are born with inherently different personality traits. Although mankind knows they will never see eye to eye with the opposite; they still are attracted to them, perhaps for that very reason. Unfortunately it also means there will be unavoidable conflict in the union of a woman and man. Woman's inherent sexuality and the widely dissimilar sexuality of her mate is one of the primary conflicts in marriage. They will also find diversity in their views on sex, communication, emotional expression, nearly every aspect in their lives.

Discussion

Sex has made marriages and broken them. Great relationships do not always translate into wonderful sex! Many couples love each other deeply, but still don't have a fulfilling sexual relationship. Havelock Ellis (1859-1939) wrote in The New Spirit, 'The omnipresent process of sex, as it is woven into the whole texture of our man's or woman's body, is the pattern of all the process of life'. This leads me to believe our sexuality is the core to ourselves. Unfortunately there are so many variants between men and women emotionally that unavoidable conflicts will surface in the bedroom. Adam and Eve are the only union who ever had the freedom of entering marriage and lovemaking with no preconceived ideas no hang-ups, and no inhibitions. Men and women each possess different outlooks toward the act of sex. Most women need an emotional connection prior to experiencing a truly satisfying sexual encounter(Kristin 1992).

Whereas men tend to avoid deeply emotional bonding. Men can be happy with superficial love, not that all men stop there. Women also feel affection is the essential cement of her relationship with a man. She marries a man that cares about her, and she wants him to express his care often. Without it she usually feels alienated from him. With it she will become emotionally bonded to him. Learning the sexual outlook of each other's partner will increase the ability to deal with the sexual conflicts that materialize.

Fear of failure and rejection and the belief that something ...