Trumpet by Jackie Kay

“There were people who said he had a baby face, there were people who said he had a high voice. I'd fight anyone who said those things. I never suspected a thing.

-Big Red McCall, Joss Moody Trio”

After reading a couple of reviews online and read the wiki-page of Trumpet and Jackie Kay I expected a lot of this book. Unlike most books this book actually fulfilled the promise the reviews made me.

Big Red sums up the book quite well in this quote. The story about a famous trumpetist who in dead actually turns out not to be who he seemed like, namely, he wasn't a he. This rich novel length love story is about how other people deal with that great loss but also about how identity can make or break a person. (Segal, 183-238)

Milly Moody, Joss Moody's wife, breaks down after her husband's death. She has to learn to live not only without her husband but, as we read in the first chapter, also with the swarm of reporters that want to know everything about her life with “the famous transvestite”. Milly can't handle this and runs off to their summer house in Torr, all the while she keeps looking back on the life she had with Joss. She has a lot of problems adjusting to her new life as a widow but feels that in the small town, where no-one knew Joss as being a famous musician, she can do so at her own peace without the bugging of reporters at her door. Except one, Sophie, who keeps sending her letters trying to convince her to tell her story and does so by showing that Colman, her son, has already done so. As the story continues, she slowly comes to peace with her loss and turns into a woman who is once again full of spirit to fight her battles in life. (Desert, 17-26)

“If they come I will be ready for them. I will tell them all about being Joss Moody's widow. I will not be shy. Now that I think about them, I realize that I actually want them to come. I know that if I actually see Colman and he looks me straight into the eyes, he will not be able to do this book. Not Possible. When they come for me in the morning, or the morning after that, or the afternoon after that, or the following week, I will be ready.” - Milly Moody

Colman, their son, on the other hand gets infuriated after the Funeral Director tells him the news. The young man of 30 years feels like his whole world collapses, he realizes his parents have lied to him his whole life and he can't handle it. In his head he replays old memories, small details he never thought anything off suddenly seem to get great significance, he realizes why his dad never went swimming with him and why he was never allowed into their bedroom, but some memories enrage him ...